Q: Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?
A: They have no hands to knock on the door.
Q: How do you fix a gourd?
A: With a pumpkin patch.
Q: What was the pumpkin’s favorite sport?
Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by it’s diameter?
A: Pumpkin Pi.
Q: How do gourds get to so strong?
A: By pumpkin iron.
Q: Who helps little pumpkins cross the road safely?
A: The crossing gourd.
Q: When is a pumpkin not a pumpkin?
A: When you drop it – then it’s a squash.
Q: What grows when you plant a pumpkin spice latte and water it with vodka?
A: A sorority.
Q: Why do we carve pumpkins for Halloween?
A: Because they're less bloody.